Black Belt Testing

OK, I really feel quite well about how my black belt testing went....

I was a little nervous for last night's session, which was mostly focused on kata. I had been practicing 17 or 18 katas really intensely for the few days before that, and I was so worried that they would start to blend into one another and I wouldn't be able to keep them straight if I got a little nervous during the test.

But all said and done I performed 15 of them during the test (including one bo kata), and as far as I know, I did not switch over to Kosokun Dai in the middle of Bassai Dai... yay me!

We also did lots of basics (all Japanese terminology), three-step, endurance, a small show of bunkai, and a little taste of self defense.

Even though we knew tonight's session had a bit of everything, too..... bunkai, one-step, self-defense, free sparring, judging, and the reading of our thesis, I was surprisingly calm all of today, and really spent very little time focused on karate. The things we were covering in tonight's session weren't really things to physically prepare for.

And over all, it was really really fun!

I wasn't too worried about the bunkai, I think I could do that routine in my sleep. And if I may say, I'm really super proud of my thesis... I haven't written any kind of paper since at least Opt school, if not undergrad (Opt school thesis doesn't count since it was a group thing.... kind of). I was most nervous about free sparring, self-defense, and one-step.... in that order.

Except for a brief moment when I completely gave in to a hold of Mitchell's in self-defense (I got over it), I felt I gave {pretty much} the best I could. I say {pretty much} because sometimes it took me a little while to get really riled up enough to be fighting my hardest. When I was almost pinned to the floor in free sparring, I decided that THAT was not happening.... and now I know that I have enough fire in me to get out of a situation like that in real life. I actually can't even imagine how much more strength one would have in a real life or death situation. Crazy!

So overall I'm feeling pretty good.... although REALLY sore!

Have to present 2 katas next Thursday, with "more hips" (the story of my karate life!). And teach a class. And then I am done. (Hopefully). Phew.

Off to the tub again....

"Doing" Life

OK, so why the last blog post?

I hadn't blogged anything in forever, so why now?

I really felt, at the time, like finding those grays was gonna be life changing.

Life is passing by so quickly, and I feel like maybe I'm being too passive. I thought my recent 'find' might be a wake up call, to start happening to life, instead of letting life happen to me.

Maybe I was finally going to become the person I want to be.

But I just don't know.

I'm still really busy with 'busy' work.

And I'm tired. And I'm stressed. And I'm overwhelmed.

Life isn't stopping, or even slowing down, to let me start being the mom, wife, sister, daughter, friend, optometrist, photographer, homemaker, artist, etc.... that I want to be.

Hmmm, gonna have to find a way to 'do life' while life is happening I guess.

We'll see how it goes....

I'll keep you posted.

Or not.

Getting Older

For the first time in my life I feel old.

Last night, I found my first gray hair.

And my second. And my third.

There may be more lurking in the back, but if there is, my husband was being too kind to mention it.

OK, as I think about it, I don't actually feel old. At all.

But I feel like I must be getting old.

I mean I have *actual* gray hairs.

My reaction was surprising to both myself and C.B.

Because I definitely had a reaction.

I was really affected by this. I really can not believe it.

I kept searching my scalp, tilting my head to change the reflection of the lighting.... the grays were there, no doubt about it.

I didn't think I was the type to be bothered by this kind of thing.

And I'm probably not, really.

I'm just in awe that it's happening NOW.

I feel WAY too young to have gray hairs!!

So even though C.B. thought he was being funny this morning, don't call me Silver Fox just yet.....

I've plucked out all offenders.